tell me a tale

    光昨天寫了她的人生給我。她問我寫得怎麼樣，我說我不懂為什麼連自己的人生也要被評頭論足，她說我必須跳脫出來。看了兩段，太過隱私了喔，我不忍看，這樣的行為好似竊賊囂張的看著你每天坐在櫃檯會看到的經過的人，走在校園你走著會看到的別人的故事，她是那麼心碎但我卻是如此的冷漠。


    然而前幾天在中山捷運站看到了之，或許是因為FB的關係或是其他其他的關聯她似乎知道我和光相熟她迴避了我的眼神，即便我們根本完全不相識。其實我知道關於崇拜和惺惺相惜後那討人厭的佔有慾，我厭惡有才華的人我討厭他們總是一派輕鬆而我卻要這麼這麼努力才能達到，我討厭他們可以這樣放縱自己即便眼前的現在已經腐爛的一踏塗地，是什麼讓你沒有後顧之憂? 我討厭自己總是厭世又媚世 媽的。文中過分引用我也都能理解，因為內裡要炸裂無從宣洩當看到有人寫的太好比你好你只能像是失語症一樣手舞足蹈但什麼話也說不出勉強擠出一句:就是這樣了，罷。因為這樣無法抽離只能永遠附著在別人的故事下想像自己到底是該何以名狀。很悲哀吧。
    
    所以我什麼評論也說不出:我覺得這樣很OK。

Je m'appelle Victor Maynard

-Je vole
 J'ai volé
 Je volais
potpourri (blended flavor)
half now half later
acupressure 
your reputation is in tatters 
mad like balloon
i'm not decent 
putting you off (be distracted)
don't wind him up

Half of Mr. toast

 97 days left before the July comes, but i was indifferent to pretend emotional act, actually thought of not my business comes up in my mind, but i was sill astonished that you volunteered to be there, how far far the place is.  it seems things is goin' end and all the sentimental stuff should be jeered since bird of your own hatching. Cause things are gonna change so fast.

en gallop, it beats me but i do not know

This place is damp and ghostly
I am already gone
And the halls were lined with the disembodied
And dustly wings, which fell from flesh
Gasplessly

And I go where the trees go
And I walk from a higher education
For now and for hire

And it beats me, but I do not know
It beats me but I do not know
I do not know

Palaces and storm clouds
The rough, straggly sage
And the smoke
And the way it will all come together
In quietness and in time

And you laws of property
Oh, you free economy
And you unending afterthoughts
You could've told me before

Never get so attached to a poem
You forget truth that lacks lyricism
Never draw so close to the heat
That you forget that you must eat, oh... 

joe table

first you said the word about my circle eyes,

second you had something hidden in the pants

third i have fussed over all the relationship you know?

dear sheep, i knew you, you ain't be so honest , are you?

you just hides your obscene under the mask of gentle man, you are hypocrite, you are not so shy as you look like. 

we went to have a good night eat, around the department store. after parking our car, we detour alot with no idea where we were, so we asked about the direction, and the smoking-mrs didn't know exactly, she asked the man near the trunk, and the no idea man turn to the other man at the driver seat.Then the driver-seat man said about a blurred answer, and suddenly there is a light bulb go on their head, they simultaneous point out a direction with nagging words. so we hesitantly walked there and could not find any clue of it.finally we called for help and found it in the other side of the department in the end. so how can they suddenly get the possibility coherently?

we danced in the car, we sang inharmoniously, we ate, ate those big hamburgers, we were pleased.

Petri Volanen

Forest of Light

Spring Morning - Part I'

that reminds me of the song, " mist, and the land ", by desert chang.

There She Goes- The Babyshambles

I do declare I was surprised to see you stay
only to be betrayed by the one you gave all your love and trust to

And tell me how could I let go
Since I caught a glimpse of your immense soul
You were dancing to northern soul
Just one glance, and well you know...

There she goes a little heartache
There she goes a little pain
Make no mistake, she sheds her skin like a snake
On the dirty road to fame, dirty road to fame my lord now,
Oh There she goes a little heartache
There she goes a little pain
Make no mistake she sheds her skin like a snake
You're going to walk the plank again, walk the plank again my lord now

I was to implore that you forget all you saw
When you came through my door and from your bag
You pulled out more skag than I'd ever seen
No! how could I let go?
Since I caught a glimpse of your white plimsoles
Twisting and turning to northern soul
Just once glance, ah well you know,
Everybody knows

There she goes a little heartache
The she goes a little pain
Make no mistake she sheds her skin like a snake
On the dirty road to fame, dirty road to fame my lord now
There she goes a little heartache
There she goes a little pain
Make no mistake she sheds her skin like a snake
You're going to walk the plank again, walk the plank again
There she goes a little, there she, there she, there she goes


radiohead- bloom

Open your mouth wide
Universal sighs
And while the ocean blooms
It’s what keeps me alive
So I lose and start over
Don’t blow your mind with why

I’m moving out of orbit
Turning in somersaults
Turning in somersaults
I dive into those eyes
I dive into those eye
Timid fish go by

Joy Division - Disorder

Until the spirit new sensation takes hold, then you know,
I've got the spirit, but lose the feeling,


Soviet - Candy Girl

bleach

拖著泥沙終於回到了家 ，渾身是屬於海的鹽的味道
然後脫掉外衣一頭倒下不省人事


一通電話驚醒 瞬間像是從泥水中被撈了出來
狼狽不堪 汗與油滿佈


到現在我還是覺得噁心。

The Temple of the Golden Pavilion :Mishima Yukio

金閣寺--
三島由紀夫
Preface:

日本的大師小林秀雄曾寫過《金閣寺燒亡》，將縱火僧視為狂人，但是縱火僧並非他人，因為現代充滿狂人，對人生厭得無聊是必然會發作的，再想過要自殺的青春期都會經驗過；在這樣的時代要維持"正常"相當刻苦不易，有許多憤怒與悲哀，為了能繼續維持"正常"，依三島的想法，就是要將這種狂氣視為一種藝術性的生命力，或許三島作為同時代的人，對於主角的想法有連帶感，所以將此一孤獨的青年描繪成挫折的英雄，三島再寫此一作品時三十歲，因此能不顧與事實的均衡問題而將犯罪行為藝術化，讓《金閣寺》遠離實際的事件，有著不可思議的崇高的獨自性；小林秀雄曾問三島為什麼沒讓主角自殺，三島或許是捧大前輩的場，所以回了一句"或許把它殺掉比較好吧!"  


chapter8 
大凡生物，都不像金閣那樣具有嚴密的"獨一性"。人類只不過是承受自然的諸種屬性的一部分，代替他傳播繁殖而已，我認為，如果殺人是為毀滅對方的"獨一性"，則殺人是永遠的誤算。這樣一來，金閣和人類的存在便愈能顯示出明確的對比：一方面由於人體容易毀滅，反而浮現永生的幻影；而金閣由於她不壞的美感，反而露出毀滅的可能性，也就是說，像人類這種生命有限的東西是不會根絕的，而像金閣那樣不滅的東西是可以毀滅的。


付喪神記
"陰陽雜記云，器物經百年，吸日月之精華，幻化成形，自此誆騙世人，稱之為"付喪神"，故此，世俗每臨立春前，家家戶戶清理出舊器物，拋棄於路旁，此謂之除歲。是故付喪神時時遭劫，永遠湊不足百年之數。"


我看著母親背後碎花的腰帶，我在思索使她變得如此鄙俗的原因......原來是希望!猶如濕紅的頑癬，付在玷污的皮膚上，經常使人發癢，永不服輸的希望，藥石罔效的希望。


chapter 10
"我就這樣平平凡凡的過一輩子嗎?"
"人家認為你平凡未必就平凡，如果你有超群絕倫的表現，人家立刻會另眼相看。世人是健忘的。"
"你認為我應該平凡的過一輩子?或是按照我的理想去開拓人生?"
"不論哪一方面都會中斷的。即使你用盡心思勉強它繼續下去，仍有中斷的一天。火車奔馳時，乘客是靜止的，車子一停，乘客勢必要走出車廂，奔馳和休憩都中止了。死，雖是人生最後的休憩，但也不知要持續到什麼時候。"


我交叉著腿，眺望了許久。
一留神，才發覺我渾身上下都是擦傷或是灼傷，血正汨汨的流著，手指上也染著血漬，該是剛敲門時受的傷。我像逃遁的野獸一般舔著傷口。
我掏出口袋中的小刀和包在手帕裡的安眠藥瓶，仍到谷底去。


又從另一個口袋裡摸出香菸點上火，抽著菸。我突然想起"好死不如歹活"這句話，我心想：還是活下去吧!

dear wisdom, did you sing a song or a poem

騷夏。瀕危動物

親愛的霸霸，你還在生氣嗎?

你的生氣讓我好尷尬，我只好抱著空心的歷史發呆

空心的父系歷史，空心的母系歷史

無法感受它們兩者匯進我的時間，但是我一路撿拾它們對我的影響

例如我親愛的霸霸他一直生的氣

親愛的霸霸，為了研磨你的生平，我的近視加深了

我看到的世界像是不夠亮的白日光燈

是不是事情可以更簡單，例如你三更半夜撥給我的電話

就像你說的：隨便聊聊嘛，

那麼我親愛的霸霸，可以聊女人嗎?


虛構的妹妹不知道謥哪裡撿回一個蛋
她把蛋帶回棉被窩裡孵  結果孵出了一顆鑽石戒指
妹妹把鑽石戒指送給了虛構的媽媽
媽媽很開心馬上就把戒指戴了起來


虛構的爸爸回來了
爸爸看到媽媽在大門的貨地窗前對他搖手 並且很滿意地笑
爸爸說：你是在對我招手嗎? 妳看我回家很開心嗎?
媽媽說：不是 我是在看我戒指上的鑽石亮不亮


爸爸知道妹妹孵蛋的事以後 就看出了她的才華
於是爸爸每天回來 都會帶著各種不同的蛋給妹妹
有巧克力蛋 有草莓蛋 奶昔蛋 小熊髮飾蛋
爸爸有一次還帶搬回來一顆非常非常非常大的百貨公司蛋
大蛋破殼的那天  全家都圍過來
結果大蛋孵出了很多的小蛋


有短靴蛋、高跟鞋蛋、唇蜜蛋、精油香水蛋、項鍊蛋
還有V領針織衫蛋、棉麻衫蛋、折疊腳踏車蛋、小花裙蛋.....
妹妹很細心 繼續把蛋一個一個給孵出來
媽媽說：但有真蛋和假蛋 要看到真蛋才能孵 不然會做白工
所以妹妹在孵蛋前 都會先用燈泡照一下
妹妹問我：為什麼我不去孵蛋
妹妹說我的屁股那麼多脂肪 肉彈的胸膛看起來也很溫暖 可以一起來幫忙
我說好 然後 我突然一個跌倒 就把蛋給坐破了


爸爸和媽媽對我搖搖頭 要我多和妹妹學習 
動作可不可以不要那麼粗魯
他們很替我擔心 他們說不喜歡孵蛋也要學習習慣
我只好先孵乒乓球、網球、保齡球......這些像蛋的東西進行練習
似乎練了一段時間 但是我也似乎很快就忘了這件事


直到一天 上床睡覺前 妹妹告訴我
最近她自己也生了一個蛋
她的口氣變得很兇 疑神疑鬼的 
她擔心別人會把她的蛋吃掉或偷走
那一陣子裡 妹妹除了努力的孵出她自己生的蛋
其它的 她就不管了
所以那一陣子 我們機都沒有禮物
我都在猜 妹妹生的蛋 會孵出什麼?
媽媽說：根本就不用猜 蛋裡面一定是個男人
爸爸說：在古代 太自私的女兒 都會被鞭打的
我和妹妹都太自私了
妹妹如果被敲頭坐為懲罰 那麼 我應該打成腦震盪


總而言之 那天大家的心情都不太好


最難過的孩是妹妹了 等到夜深 大家都案靜的躺平了
我卻從棉被縫看見 她把她的蛋抱了出來
她在蛋殼上鑿了一個洞
她伸進去一根長柄湯匙 然後順時鐘方向開始攪攪攪
完全攪散之後
她就緩緩抱起那顆蛋 一口一口慢慢喝掉
她還轉頭過來問我要不要和她一起喝
她說她造就知道我在偷看她了
就像她早就知道這是一顆未受精卵
她說她要變得更健康 將來 要為自己生下更健康的蛋 

Night mother,Marsha Norman

Actually Mrs.norman writes scripts.(the script would be partially provided here) and the head of the the theatre said that this script just got Pulitzer Prizes that no wonder only conversations covered in the whole play, no more music, no more characters , no more scenery.

ya this is the first time for me to join this kind of show, so i shouldn't give comments on their performance. but btw i have to say that it's shock to be so close to 'em.

During the drama, i just kept wondering why she(the daughter) kept asking her mother some  trivial things and kept emphasized that she would commit suicide that night. so did every suicider claim or announce their date  advanced? it doesn't look like she was too tired to live, it sounded like she just want to strike her resentful. and to speak frankly,it was just a "explanation" to rationalize her death! And audiences were swept by the  sadness, and said "oh, i still cannot come over with it". hey, how about the position were just exchanged? how about the mother said she doesn't want to live? no one would say the debt of the raising gratitude, so it means she deserved it?  hey, i just want to say, the point isn't about the live or death, i just want to ask, why do  we rule ourselves? we can't choose to be birthed, why can't we choose death on our own? 

for me, epilepsy, failure of love, death of lover, fail of career, and so on, they ain't to be the reasons.    

i see, the brown hair with you

hurry back, plz

Sway, sway

Mumford & Sons - White Blank Page

Oh Lead me to the truth and I will follow you with my whole life 
Taken By Trees - "My Boys"



High Highs - Open Season



the alarm cloks - yeah

Frederic Fontenoy

Frederic Fontenoy

Oh Land, are you Faye?

March 19, 2011, 4:22 PM

A Range of Styles in Three Performances

By JON PARELES

Josh Haner/The New York Times1, 2, 3 performing at Club de Ville in Austin on Friday.

Oh land -  the English-friendly stage name of the Danish songwriter Nanna Ø and Fabricius — brought a jazzy, tech-savvy ingenuity to dance-pop songs. Her beats pushed with syncopation rather than bombast; her voice was both elfin and strong, flicking her zigzagging melody lines across the music. Using an electronic percussion gizmo, she tapped out lines in counterpoint to what she was singing; every so often she electronically harmonized her voice into a chorus, but she’s one singer who needs no Auto-Tune. Her songs are snappy, with elegant little convolutions, and she performed them while twirling merrily around the stage, sharing the delight of a pop craftsmanship that eludes formulas.

Josh Haner/The New York Times

Oh Land at the Billboard Bungalow on Thursday.

Jamie Woon, a British singer who’s learned quite a few things from Stevie Wonder — vocal Arabesques, funk vamps — but applied them with a darker, moodier sensibility.  He used the stark pulses and surreal glow of electronic dance music, sometimes switching to more live instruments partway through, to surround minor-mode tunes that sounded far less optimistic than his lyrics: “How will we get through tomorrow every day?/I don’t know but we get through it anyway.” For all their positive thinking, the songs had a mournful streak.

1,2,3 — a band from Pittsburgh with a Google-defying name — fought technical problems to play songs that put cantankerous twists into taut rock structures. During its brief set, songs hinted at lurching roots-rock, Talking Heads’ new wave funk, the keyboard filigree of progressive rock and the slow roll of a soul ballad. Lead vocals had a wry, scratchy edge, even as they delivered scrappy, snappy choruses: “I’m scared,” went one, “but not that scared.”

Hexar, you like a stranger to me.

second。green with envy

green means in experience or new to something 

new to particular job

i am a big green in this field so i need to be more practice.

one said:"a bird in a hand is worth two in a bush "

# Multi-exposure 

* switch from Off to P-mode while pressing SELF * the display will show 0 left of number of shot, e.g. 0[03] * with each exposure, the left number increases, e.g. 1[03], 2[03] etc.. * switch to Off, and the film is transported to the next frame. 

* more than 9 exposures are possible, but not indicated. 

# Manual selection of flash guide number 

* switch from Off to P-mode while pressing SELECT * keep pressing SELECT and use UP/DOWN for GN selection * when releasing SELECT, camera displays [PFl]. 

* switch to Off, and the selection is deleted. * when required GN number is not available, select nearest lower number, e,g. GN24 not available, then select GN23. 

# Infrared auto focus * load film, and switch camera on (P, A, or M mode) 

* IR film is non DX, so requires pressing the shutter release button to advance to frame 1. 

* switch to A mode, then press SELECT until ISO values are displayed. Within 3 secs, press DOWN untill [—] is shown. press MF once to display [750] (corresponding to Konica IR750 film) press MF twice to display [850] (corresponding to Kodak’s 850 film) (the numbers correspond to the wavelength the films are sensitive for) 

* after 3 secs, the display will show [iso 100], acknowledging successful setting of IR value. 

* for correct exposure, consult the data sheet of the film. # Fast exposure setting (fast related to setting, not exposure!) 

* select aperture in M-mode. 

* partially press shutter release button. 

* display shows proper shutter time. * press UP or DOWN, and that time is selected. This allows for a very quick spotmetering. When now the composition is changed, including DOF, the measured time still is used. # Auto-bracketing * switch to M-mode and press SELECT until [+/- 0.0] is shown. 

* use UP/DOWN to select increment, from 1/3 to 2 stops. * when pressing shutter release, three exposures are taken. 

17' - Brian Oldham

17 'Brian Oldham